Not Again
by Whisper in the Night
Summary: [One-Shot] This is the last time. The last time that Kagome will just stand by and watch Kikyou and Inuyasha. She's made up her mind; she's leaving Feudal Japan... forever.


Not Again  
  
Song: Solitude  
  
Artist: Evanescence  
  
A/N: Well, before I write the Disclaimer, I just want to give you a heads up on something. Many of you may be wondering, why the hell I'm making yet ANOTHER story, when I still have other stories that are not finished yet, and are in serious need of an update. Well, first of all, this is only going to be a one-shot, unless I decide to make a sequel or something, and also, once I get ideas for another story in my head, it enables me to concentrate on my other stories, until I finally write the one I was thinking about. So, after this one, I promise you guys/girls updates on my other stories.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own the Inuyasha Series, and never will. I also do not own 'Solitude' by Evanescence.  
  
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~[words]~ = Music  
  
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~How many times have you told me, you love her?~  
  
~As many times as I wanted to tell you, the truth.~  
  
~How long have I stood here, beside you?~  
  
~I lived through you, you looked through me.~  
  
Peering out from behind a tree, was Kagome, her eyes brimmed with tears, as she watched Inuyasha and Kikyou share yet another one of their deep kisses. 'Why?' Was all that Kagome could think about, 'Why does he always do this to me?' Slowly, she turned away from them, and began walking back towards Keade's village, where the gang was resting for the night. She would go there, and say goodbye to her friends. . . forever. There was nothing left for her here in the feudal era. The Shikon no Tama was almost complete, and Naraku had been killed. The only shards that remained for them to gather, were the ones belonging to Kouga. Without Kagome around to stop him, Inuyasha could kill Kouga for the shards. But why would that matter to Kagome? It seemed that nothing mattered to her. . . anymore. After she said her goodbyes, she would leave this place, and go home, to live a normal life in modern Japan.  
  
~Ooo, Solitude~  
  
~Still with me is only you.~  
  
~Ooo, Solitude~  
  
~I can't stay away from you.~  
  
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Inuyasha suddenly parted from Kikyou's kiss. He didn't know why, but for some reason, there was an aching feeling in his heart. It felt as if there was something wrong. He turned away from Kikyou, and without uttering another word to her, he ran off towards the village, leaving Kikyou standing there, dumbfounded.  
  
~How many times have I done this to myself?~  
  
~How long will it take before I see?~  
  
He burst into the hut, trying to regain his breath, and was surprized to feel a very sad aura floating in the air. "W-what's wrong?" He asked everyone, acting as if nothing had just happened. Sango looked up at him suddenly, with a tear streaked face, and holding a crying Shippou in her lap. "What's wrong, Inuyasha?" Sango said to him, "What's wrong!! KAGOME LEFT!!! SHE'S NEVER COMING BACK!!! SHE TOLD US THERE WAS NOTHING LEFT FOR HER IN THIS ERA, AND SHE RAN OFF CRYING!!! WE DIDN'T EVEN GET A CHANCE TO ASK HER WHY SHE WAS LEAVING!!!" By the time Sango had finished telling him, she was yelling. She closed her eyes tightly, as more tears came pouring down her already red face. "What? W-why'd she do that?!" Inuyasha stuttered, still acting as if he hadn't the slightest clue why. "Inuyasha..." Miroku spoke up, his voice filled with anger, and... hate, for his best friend, "How can you act so dumb? You -know- why Kagome left. Tell me... How many times did you pay attention to Kagome, silently crying in the background, while you snuck off to see Kikyou?!" Inuyasha stared at Mirkoku in slight bewilderment. "I-I..." Inuyasha tried to say something, but his voice refused to work. "Inuyasha! Don't even try to tell us you cared!" Miroku continued, "Once Kikyou would come into the picture, you would completely forget about Kagome's feelings, and leave to go find 'lover'! We all know you try as hard as you can to protect Kagome from any pain. Does that include emotional pain as well, Inuyasha? Well, if it does, you've failed at protecting her from it countless times. In fact, you're the one that causes it! You've broken her heart so many times before, and she's put up with it... until now. We're surprized she's even stayed this long, Inuyasha! We're surprized, after seeing you with Kikyou so many times before, that she hadn't already fled for home for good. So, Inuyasha, you can go on and complete the Shikon no Tama, get Kikyou to purify it, and you can become the youkai you've always wanted to become, because you know what? It doesn't matter anymore. Kagome is leaving." With that said, Miroku hung his head down like the others, refusing to look at Inuyasha. Even if they had looked up, they wouldn't see him, because he wasn't there.  
  
~When will this hole in my heart be mended?~  
  
~Who now is left alone but me?~  
  
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Inuyasha ran. He ran as fast as he could, headed towards the well. Only one thing remained in his mind, 'Kagome.'  
  
~Ooo, Solitude~  
  
~Forever me and forever you~  
  
~Ooo, Solitude~  
  
~Only you, Only true~  
  
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Kagome sat on the edge of the Bone-Eaters Well, hands resting on the wood on either side of herself. Her head was hund down, her black bangs covering her eyes, tears streaking her once perfectly smooth face. Now, it was rough and red from crying, and with each tear that was shed, it felt as if it were leaking from her heart. It was obvious that she was still crying, as she shuddered everyone in a while, due to her silent sobs. Looking up, her lips curved upward just ever-so-slightly, as she saw the image in front of her. The God Tree... the first place she had ever laid eyes upon Inuyasha. He had been pinned to it with a sacred arrow, shot by... "Kikyou" The name sounded so painful to Kagome, as she spoke it. So painful to her heart, was Kikyou, the woman who continued to steal Inuyasha away from her, little by little. Kikyou, the one who was slowly stealing the one thing that mattered most to Kagome in the world. No, it wasn't Kagome's soul, which was what Kikyou always tried to take life for. It was Inuyasha, the one Kagome loved with all her heart, soul (which was very big), and so much more. How could Kagome be happy, knowing that she could never have the one she loved, because there would always be another person that he loved more? She couldn't, and she wouldn't.  
  
~Everyone leaves me stranded, forgotten, abandoned left behind.~  
  
~I can't stay her another night~  
  
~Your secret admirer, who could it be?~  
  
Kagome brought her hand up to an object hanging from her neck, and held it there for a few seconds. Then without notice, she pulled her hand away, snapping the chain that it hung from, and held it clasped in her hand, that was resting in her lap. Kagome sighed lightly, as all the memories of her and Inuyasha came flooding back to her, while she stared at the God Tree, and held the object in her hand. There were so many memories, most of them happy, yet others, that ripped Kagome's heart out. There were the moments were it seemed like Inuyasha would die, due to wounds from battle, and then, there were the memories of night's like this... when Inuyasha left Kagome for Kikyou. Those one's hurt so much, Kagome could barely stand it. A whimper was emitted from Kagome's mouth, as the tears threatened to fall again. She lowered her head down, once again, in defeat.  
  
~Can't you you see all along it was me?~  
  
~How can you be so blind as to see right through me?~  
  
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Inuyasha came to the clearing, just after Kagome had lowered her head. The sight was horrible to him. How could he not have noticed before, the sorrow and depression Kagome went through, every time he was so selfish and snuck off to find Kikyou? The sad auora was even stronger in the air here, than back at the hut. This pain that Kagome was feeling right now, hurt so much more than all the physical pain she had felt before. Miroku had been right. He had been right about every single thing he had just told Inuyasha, and this was the first time, Inuyasha was actually seeing it.  
  
~Solitude~  
  
~Still with me is only you~  
  
Kagome looked up, sensing Inuyasha's presence, and almost immediately got to her feet. Her eyes... they held so much misery and forlorn, Inuyasha could hardly stand it. It was almost as if the life that once lived inside them, had died, and it brought tears to Inuyasha's eyes, though he refused to let them fall in front of Kagome. Slowly, Inuyasha took a few steps forward, and Kagome did the same, until they were just a few feet from each other. "K-Kagome..." Inuyasha spoke quietly to Kagome, not knowing what to say, but a slight relief washed over him as Kagome cut in. "Inuyasha, don't speak... I already know what you're going to say to me." Inuyasha was surprized at how calm her voice was, but even though her head was lowered once again, he knew the same calmness was not residing in her eyes. Kagome continued though, before Inuyasha found his voice to speak. "Though as much as it pains my heart... I know the truth. It's taken me so long to see it, but now... I finally do. You love Kikyou... you always will, and I am just... her replacement. I can't take her place in your eyes, and I never will. I've never even come close to doing so. And whenever I felt that I was getting closer to you, Kikyou would come by and push me further away. All those times Kikyou had tried to kill me, and I was relieved that she had missed me, I now regret being thankful. I sincerely wish now, that she had brought my life to an end, before I had the chance to...love you. Maybe if she had killed me in the beginning, I would not have to experience the pain that I feel. The pain that is killing me now, bit by bit, and hurts more than Kikyou's arrow pinning through my heart, ever would. If I had died before, it would have been for the better. You would have the one you love, Kikyou would have her soul back, and I... I wouldn't be in the way anymore. You know, it's silly," Kagome laughed quietly, though there was no humor in it, "I can imagine, that you promised yourself, that once the jewel was complete, you would ditch me, and forget I ever existed. But Inuyasha, I'll never forget you... not even if I tried to force myself to." Without giving any signal, Kagome wrapped her arms around Inuyasha's neck, and sobbed violently into his chest. Inuyasha wrapped his arms around her waist, almost as naturally as if it were a reflex, and held onto her, trying to calm her crying.  
  
~Ooo, Solitude~  
  
~I can't stay away from you~  
  
As suddenly as she had flung herself at him, she pulled away, and looked up into his eyes with her own tear-filled ones. Gingerly, she reached out for one of his hands, and held it in both of hers for a few moments. After Kagome pulled her hand back, Inuyasha looked down at his own. Surprized, he saw two items lieing in it. "Inuyasha, I need to give and free you a few things... before I leave. I'm giving you the shards of the jewel, that we have found together, and made into one. You can get the remaining ones from Kouga. Without it in my posession though, I will never be able to return to the feudal era after I leave. The other thing that I left in your hand, is the prayer beads that hung around your neck for so long." Somehow, Kagome had managed to lift the prayer beads from his neck while hugging him, without him noticing. "Without these, Inuyasha, you will be free... from me. No longer will you fall face-first to the ground, when I utter the word 'Sit'..." Inuyasha cringed at the word, and prepared to go diving into the grass, but when nothing happened, he looked down at the beads in his hand, and then up at Kagome. "And Inuyasha, there's one more thing..." There were only two things in Inuyasha's hand, and knowing this, he waited to see what Kagome was talking about. "...I'm leaving you... m-my... heart. Even though you can't see it, it's there. It's yours. It always has been... and it always will. Although it's been shattered, it seems, into millions of pieces, I'm giving it to you, in hopes that... you'll always r-remember me. And no, Inuyasha, I'm not giving to you to mend. In fact, I don't want you to mend it. I know that you love Kikyou, and I realize, that asking you to mend it, would be incredibly selfish of myself... so just keep it." Kagome turned away from him, not wanting to face him, and now looked to the well. "Inuyasha... I know who it is you love. Go to Kikyou...... not Kagome..." Those last two words, Kagome had whispered, not trusting herself enough the say them louder, afraid that she would start crying again. She was just about to jump into the well, for the last time, when a force quickly pushed her to the ground. Lieing on her back, she looked up, and saw Inuyasha's face just inches from her own. "I-Inu...Ya-"  
  
~Solitude~  
  
~Forever me and forever you~  
  
Kagome's voice was cut off, by Inuyasha's lips locking on to her own. Inuyasha's actions were so sudden, Kagome lost all control over her body. She couldn't push him away (Not that she wanted to), lift her arms that were lieing uselessly on the ground beside her, and she couldn't even do the simple task of blinking. Inuyasha drew back, after what seemed like forever, allowing himself and Kagome to breath. "Kagome, I love you. I love you, and only you. I will forever." Kagome looked into Inuyasha's golden orbs, and she automatically knew, that this was for real. This definately wasn't some attempt to get her to stay in the Feudal Era. As Kagome regained movement of her body, Inuyasha slid his lips onto hers again, in a passionate kiss. Kagome didn't push Inuyasha away though, that was the furthest thing from her mind. Instead, she did what she had wanted to do for so long; she wrapped her arms around his neck, and kissed him back.  
  
Eventually, the two fell asleep; with only the forest, the moon, the stars, and the night as their company.  
  
~Ooo, Solitude~  
  
~Only you, Only true~  
  
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The End  
  
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A/N: So, how did you like it? To tell me, press the pretty little button in the bottom, left-hand corner. Also, tell me what you think of the song. You know, whether it goes pretty good with the story. If not, I will look for another one. Well guess what? This story took me four days to write, plus a while after to add the song. I know, pathetic isn't it? But, that's the problem with short attention spans. (You get side-tracked easily.) ^_^  
  
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